Passion Isn't Just For The Devine
by heavenpeters
Summary: When a female psychopath who calls herself "Mist" ravages the streets of New York City the BAU is called to investigate. But things get messy when a team member falls for her. Reid/OC
1. Prologue: Atrum Caliga

Passion Isn't Just For The Devine

Prologue: Atrum Caliga

_Everything has its wonders, even darkness and silence- Helen Keller_

I sat in my apartment staring out the window into the cool New York night. It's as if the darkness was calling, it's intoxicating perfume swirling against the glass. I wanted to breathe it in, let it take me away, but I couldn't. If I did, I wouldn't be able to control myself. No matter how hard I tried to stop it, the darkness always had its way. It consumed me.

The next thing I knew I was back in my apartment. I was on the floor looking up at the cheap paint on my ceiling. I blinked a few times, recalling the past few hours. It always happened like this, I blacked out and for a moment I felt almost normal. But I could never feel normal I could never feel anything. It was like being numb all the time, floating in a never-ending grey. I tried to float up, to swim into the white cloud of emotion where everyone else was, but I couldn't. So instead I took the easy way out and let myself drown in a black abyss. There was only one way that I could sink so low I would lose myself. The kill. Most people would say I'm sick, twisted, crazy but when I'm killing it's like an out of body experience. It's not me, I'm just watching from above. Floating through the night like a black, deadly mist.

The stages of murder are usually as follows; the fantasy, the plan, the stalking, the killing, the guilt and then the depression. When the depression gets to be too much that's when the cycle repeats itself. For me though it's never been like that. It's the depression that I crave. Without it, I don't feel anything at all. I've been like this all my life. Do you know what it's like not feeling any emotion? Sadness, guilt, remorse, happiness, love. I don't even know the meaning of the word love and I never will. There is no steps or stages, just the deep compulsion to kill. Sometimes I wish I could stop but I know I can't. It's too late for me. It's been too late for a long time.

**"Hi readers! I'm really excited for this story so i'll probably be updating as fast as I can. I just love the idea of innocent little Spence falling for a psychopath, hehe. Oh and this is meant to take place in season one. Also if you're wondering Atrum Caliga means Dark Mist in latin. Thanks for reading!"**


	2. A New Profile

**"This entire story is told as a narrative from the Unsub's perspective, for now she will remain nameless. The reason she knows these things about the investigation is because Spencer tells her and also her own speculation (criminals are the best profilers ;). Don't worry it will all make sense later. Please enjoy and review!"**

**Chapter 1: Sick and Twisted**

I said before that I'd never know what love meant but that's not exactly true. Little did I know in the next passing weeks I'd find true love and the only person that could ever make me truly happy. Even under my medicated fog, I can still feel everything and for the first time I don't have the urge to kill. I'm writing this story simply for my own pleasure, there's not much to do around here. Sitting in the same room, day after day. It's a true story about love and sooner or later about death. But enough about me, this story is about him.

Spencer Reid hurried silently into the BAU room, practically throwing his bag off his shoulder as he sat down.

"You're late." Said Agent Hotchner disapprovingly.

"Sorry" Spencer mouthed and JJ continued where she left off.

"So, the NYPD has called us in to help them investigate their case. So far there are four victims."

"Why didn't they call us sooner?" Morgan interjected.

"They didn't know the murders were connected until now. They found this note on the last body." JJ continued, showing a photo of the note. "It says something in another language, the police can't seem to figure it out."

Spencer looked up analyzing the note, his eyes traced over the letters: **Volo ego is totus tergum , nex. Tamen it's quoque tardus mihi , atrum has instituo it's via. Caliga teneo totus.**

"It's Latin." He said to no one in particular, the team all turned their heads expectantly. "It says something along the lines of 'I wish I could take it all back, the death. But it's too late, the darkness has found its way. The Mist knows all.'"

"And how did I not see that coming." JJ said, not at all surprised.

"So how did they not connect the murders before?" Elle Greenaway asked.

"It was just a bunch of random street killings, they thought it was just a gang." JJ answered filling the screen with crime scene photos of the victims.

"It's strange, there isn't a specific victim or type, men, women, different ethnicities. It seems as if our Unsub doesn't really care who he's killing." Spencer wondered aloud.

"It's a clean cut, right through the throat. No hesitation marks. It doesn't seem like it's our Unsub's first time killing." Morgan stated.

"I think this guy might have been killing for a lot longer than we thought." Gideon said putting down his coffee mug.

"Be on the jet in five, this is going to be a bad one." Hotch finished stone-faced, getting up from the round table, the rest of the team following close behind.

X X X

On the jet the team chatted, discussing their latest case but Spencer was lost in his own mind. He looked down at the folder open on his lap, his eyes skimming over the bloody crime scenes. 'How could any human being do something like this?' he thought, he'd been a profiler for how long and still couldn't find the answer. That's exactly why he had to keep looking. 'Mist. Mist. What's the significance?' he pondered. Mist has always been associated with blindness one definition says that mist is a haze before the eyes that dims the vision. Perhaps that's what this Unsub is trying to say. Was 'Mist' a figment of the Unsub's imagination or were they referring to themselves in third person, a common trait of narcissistic personalities. What was the symbolism of the Latin? Spencer couldn't seem to bring himself to understand this Unsub but he knew that what ever they were trying to say, they were truly a psychotic individual.

X X X

The team had visited the most recent crime scenes, as well as spoken to all the families. Nothing in the victimology suggested any connection; none of the people had ever had any overlap with another. Spencer had stayed back at the station trying to figure out the Unsub.

"What if…" he mumbled to himself, not realizing that Morgan and Elle had just entered the room.

"What if?" Morgan said, causing the younger agent to jump.

"Couldn't you give a guy a little warning?" He said standing up.

"Sorry kid." Morgan said walking over. "So you got anything for us?"

"I've been thinking about this, all this time we've been trying to find a pattern, some sort of overlap that connect these murders. Right?" Dr. Reid said, gesturing his hands the way he'd been known to do. "Well what if, there is no pattern? What if our Unsub is killing at total random?"

"Random? How's that possible, isn't there always some sort of key? No matter how sick or twisted the Unsub is?" Elle questioned, sitting down.

"For a normal Unsub, but think about it. In the note he's apologizing and even blaming the kills on some outside force, this darkness, referring to himself in third person. It's all the characteristics of a very disturbed and delusional psychotic." Reid finally finished.

"But these are organized crimes, psychotics in delusions are the total opposite." Morgan said.

"Exactly. So that's why I started thinking that maybe our Unsub suffers from an anxiety disorder and has suffered a traumatic experience in their past. It's been proven that after an individual suffers a traumatic experience, where they were severely depressed, when they come out of this they feel no emotion at all. It's simply called no-emotion syndrome." Spencer said, turning back towards the board. "So maybe by killing our Unsub is trying to get something they could possibly never have again."

"And what's that?" Elle asked.

"To feel." Dr. Reid said, the images of the killings running trough his mind. "To feel anything at all."


	3. More Bodies

**"Hey y'all sorry it took so long for me to update i've been really busy! Finally this chapter is here."**

The team had just given the profile to the officers of the New York police department; White male, thirty to forty, steady job, has suffered a traumatic experience, will have a clinical anxiety disorder but it won't be evident in his behavior. All the profilers could only hope that they would find this guy before there were anymore victims, but they all knew that another victim was the piece of the puzzle they needed right now.

"Nice one figuring out that Unsub, kid." Morgan said passing by Reid.

"Thanks." The young doctor replied looking down at his shoes. He should feel satisfied, happy even they'd orchestrated a profile using his theory of no-emotion syndrome and were now one step closer to catching the Unsub. But Spencer couldn't seem to shake this feeling; it was something about this case that just felt wrong. He had some sort of hunch that this one would not end well. Now normally Spencer Reid would scoff at the idea of a hunch or a bad feeling but he just couldn't bring himself to think that now.

"Reid, can I talk to you for a minute?" He turned around to see Hotch standing behind him.

"Yeah, of course." Spencer answered following his boss to their empty case room. Spencer stood there awkwardly not knowing what to expect.

"Reid I'm proud of you for cracking that profile." Hotch started.

"But it wasn't just-" Spencer started but was cut off.

"Yes, it was." Hotch continued "But is something wrong?" He asked.

"No, why would you say that?" Reid said trying to avoid the subject.

"You don't think we see it? You've been lost in your thoughts this entire case, poring over the files. What's wrong?" The older agent said concerned.

"It's just." Reid started. "I have a bad feeling about this. Have you ever just- had a sense that something wasn't going to end well?"

"Look Reid, we all have those cases but I need your head in this right now. You're an important asset to this team and without you I can guarantee that this will not end well." Hotch said calmly. The men just stood for a minute or two, in silent agreement. Then Hotch walked past Spencer and out the door and as he did said,

"You did good."

Spencer just stood there not really knowing what to do he was a little shocked. He thought about Hotch's kind insight and smiled a little.

X X X

I walked the streets that night with purpose; I needed to send a little message to the FBI. So far, their little investigation had been going well from what I could tell on television but they were still far off. Nowhere near catching me, in fact they still figured I was a male in his thirties to forties it was quite laughable. They thought their profile was their strongest weapon but it was weak at best. So that's why I decided I'd give them a little clue, and then maybe they would have a chance at finding me. Ah, here's the perfect victim, how those little profilers will delight in this. Hopefully for them they're smart enough to figure this one out…

X X X

"Guys, we've got a new victim." JJ said stepping to the front of the room to grab all her colleagues' attention. "Her name was Lauren Baker she's 27, her body was found down an alley way, throat slashed just like all the other victims." she held up pictures of the crime scene.

"What's that on the body?" Spencer pointed out with his pen.

"This is what had the police confused, they found this not on the body. It says; isn't there something missing?" Jennifer replied.

"Something's missing. What does he mean by that?" Gideon pondered.

"It could mean he's missing something, like he's not getting the reaction he wants?" Elle wondered.

"I think he's talking to us, saying that we're missing something." Spencer stated.

"How do you figure?' Morgan asked.

"Look, how close are we to finding this guy, not very I'd say. So maybe it means that we're missing something." Spencer said, explaining his thinking.

"But what are we missing?" Hotch asked.

**"Sorry this is so short, i wanted to get an update out. A short update is better than none at all right? The next one is going to be longer, i promise."**


End file.
